Flirting with Chemistry

The urge to skip Chemistry class devoured what little ambition I had left, at least for anything other than writing or reading! I'm addicted to this long lost love of "shitty first drafts"! This can't be good as procrastination of other classes becomes the product of my addiction.  Eighteen years ago I let go of a passion; one that aroused chills, transformed cocoons to butterflies (tummy tingles that is) and the hint of ecstasy only foreplay can do for the bloodstream.  The love affair gradually diminished the year a new love bombarded life as I knew it; the gift I prayed for was arriving.  My Angel; my baby girl; my Aerial Lee gave breathe to the poetry I once wrote. She became my story; my love; my life just as my writing once did. To nurture this cocoon with my adolescent meaning of unconditional love became a lifelong thank  you for one answered prayer. The least I could do was give up my own desires. Eighteen years later, transformation has taken place; it's time for her to fly! Release the beautiful butterfly, she must write her own story now and I must return to mine....that's where Chemistry class comes in.  

Returning to college with a redefined meaning of my first passionate love and the changed concept of ecstasy a pen and paper would provide in finding my inner most desires are now the driving forces to survive six semesters of foreplay. Having a passion for something, such as writing for me, can easily turn to an addiction.  Aside from embracing "shitty first drafts" and writer's block syndrome, the urge to gain fluency is an excuse I'm allowing to justify procrastination, that can't be good! Conquering procrastination must be first and foremost in my line of thinking so I came up with a test trial solution today.

Chemistry! I'm convinced the class is the devil in disguise.  Equations, elements, notations, beta, alpha atomic mass, alloys are just the beginning arrows Satan throws my direction.  Fight or Flight? There is no choice; I must fight! So what if Chemistry translates to an F on my high school transcript, I can't allow the arrow of self defeat be the stumbling block hindering a goal oriented 3.75 college transcript.  Assignment at hand: pick one element on the periodic table, answer multiple questions requiring ample research and let's not forget the electron configuration. Not to mention we must read all classmate's research, which is to be placed in sentence format.  How some can have a passion or love for this mind eraser of a class is beyond me. Well, until today, I had absolutely no desire but rather a "have to succeed" drive when approaching such fusion (yes, pun intended!). Then it hit me and I found myself FLIRTING! Can you believe it? I even possessed the guilt of such tease factors. Adulterating my relationship with writing, how dare I!

Solution to the equation: I wrote a story about Arsenic. Intertwined love for writing with this new found flirtatious attitude towards Chemistry could be a whole new level of ecstasy and foreplay. Oh wait, I was trying to solve procrastination, well at least I solved for X this time around.